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Your journeyman is a jerk, aren’t they?
They treat you like dirt, ask you to do things you don’t want to, expect you to know things you don’t, and generally seem to be put on earth to make sure your life is a living hell. If only there was a way to get back at them. A way to bring them to the edge, stress them out, cause them to blow a gasket.
Follow these few tips and you are guaranteed to ruin the day of any journeyman.
Always have access to your phone.
There is nothing your journeyman hates more than seeing people using work time to check on their social media. Facebook, instagram, snapchat and texting are sure to get under their skin faster than a tweet goes round the world.
For added annoyance make sure you have your notification volume set to maximum (you wouldn’t want to miss a text on a noisy work site would you?)
The creme de la creme? Asking them to hold on a sec when they are asking you to do something. Their time is valuable but their request can wait, your buddy just sent you an awesome meme of a baby goat riding a bike.
Talk a lot.
What should you talk about? Mainly how awesome you are.
If they are telling you a story make sure you interrupt their story with a better one (you know you have one about some night you and your buddies got shit faced and shaved that cat).
Never listen to what they are saying. Make sure you are trying to figure out the next awesome thing to come out of your mouth.
Is there a moment of silence? What’s wrong with you? Fill it with your voice!!!
Act like you know everything.
When your journeyman wants to show you something or wants to tell you something there is only one response:
Always say I KNOW.
There is no room for humility here. It is their job to teach you and show you things.
Take that power away from them by claiming to already know more in your 1 year in the trade than they could possibly know in their 20+ years.
Are they trying to show you how to do something? Suggest a better way. Sure it’s been done this way for years for a reason but I am sure you probably know a better way. You did get 90% once on a test. That means you’re super smart.
Use everyone’s tools but your own.
Why should you have to get your tools all scuffed up. Leave them at home! There are tons of other peoples tools lying around.
There is a debate as to what is more annoying; constantly asking to borrow some tools or not asking at all. I say mix it up a bit and keep them guessing.
The most important thing is this:
If you do use someone else’s tools make sure you DO NOT put them back where you found them. Not being able to find their tools when they need them will drive them to the looney bin.
Bonus tip: When working with step ladders make sure you leave tools on top and when you’re done just walk away. The impending drop of tools on the head is worth it.
Don’t bring a lunch.
This step is almost a guarantee to see them lose their mind and it works on so many levels.
It’s almost a given that you will have to go get something for breaks and lunch. Because you only have 15 minutes for coffee and a half hour for lunch, it is almost a given you will be late coming back from break.
You will also have to ask to use the truck or van to get it. See what I mean? Double whammy. They need the truck/ van for tools and materials but you’re gonna be late bringing it back. Boo yeah!
Once you have finished a task, don’t go looking for your journeyman to find out what’s next.
Just stand there. Better yet, make sure you are leaning on something.
OHHHH Wait!!!! I got something that is even better; Stand there leaning against a wall while texting ( At this point I am taking a bow).
Now it’s your turn.
What are some things you would like to add to the list? Things that you have seen or tested out in the field that drive your boss nuts?
It is possible that these tips may get you booted off a job, fired and/or blacklisted, but maybe trades wasn’t your thing in the first place?
I hear that new Starbucks on the corner is hiring.
I gotta go. Today is my first day on the grill at Wendys and I don’t want to be late.
Stay classy Academy!
Ps. Make sure that you read this post with a sarcastic tone in your head. Also make sure you share this by hitting the share button below. Remember the job you save may be your own.
Make sure you share this post by hitting the share buttons below.
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Until next time, stay classy Academy![/fusion_text][/fullwidth]